Maye Musk is an international model, dietitian, speaker, and author. She is known for breaking down barriers in the fashion industry and landing the face of Covergirl at age 69. At 75, she received an honourary doctorate from the University of Free State in Southern Africa and joined Oppo, a Chinese electronic giant, as its global ambassador for its flagship smartphone. Maye is a trailblazer with over 1.6M Instagram followers. #ItsGreatToBe75
Canadian Grandparents had the pleasure of speaking with Maye Musk. She is a proud Canadian and grandmother to 14 grandchildren.
To know Maye Musk is to appreciate her story.
Maye and her twin sister Kaye were born to a chiropractor father and a drama and dancing teacher mother in 1948 in Regina, Saskatchewan. When she was two, her family moved to South Africa so her father could pursue his passion for exploration.
She and her four, and later five, siblings were brought up to support the family in whatever they were doing. As young children in South Africa, Maye and her twin sister would answer the phones at her father’s chiropractic business and help mail his newsletters. It is a family commitment that has stayed with her all her life and has created a close relationship with her children and her grandchildren.
Maye married in a double wedding with her twin sister and had three children while earning her degree in dietetics. After nine years, she left her abusive husband to start pursue her dietetics practice and continue with her modelling career that started when she was 15 – all while raising her children all under the age of 10.
As a mother, Maye always believed that supporting her children’s passions would encourage them to choose a career they love. That included moving back to Canada when her oldest son Elon wanted to attend a North American school. The work ethic and planning skills she learned from her parents served her well and would become even more important.
It was when Maye moved to Toronto with her funds frozen in South Africa, no contacts for modelling or for her nutrition business that she experienced poverty like she had never known. She worked five jobs to provide for her children and taught them to be independent, responsible and help each other as a family.
Month by month, they built a life with each child showing interest in what would become their careers.
Elon loved technology so Maye bought him a computer as soon as she could afford it. He is now a technology giant who is changing the automotive, healthcare and space industries starting his own companies Tesla
, Neuralink and SpaceX.
Kimball loved cooking. Maye would take him to the grocery store and let him be the family chef.
Now he is the co-founder of The Kitchen Restaurant Group, a chain of family restaurants and is a co-founder of the non-profit Big Green, building vegetable and fruit gardens in under-served schools.
Her daughter Tosca loved movies so Maye would watch them with her. Tosca moved to Los Angeles and is the founder of PassionFlix, turning romance novels into movies.
On Being a Grandmother
Maye describes her role as a grandmother as fulfilling and fun. Her grandchildren call her Ouma, a choice she made to be unique amongst the other family grandparents.
She loves to be with her grandchildren, listening to what is new in their lives and laughing together. When asked what her favorite time with her grandchildren is, she happily responds, “Hugs, lots and lots of hugs.”
Some would consider Maye a celebrity grandmother, but to her grandchildren, she is just Ouma. She says her grandchildren may mention that friends saw her on a billboard but that’s about it. As she says, “They know what I do and accept it. I have been a model and nutritionist all their lives.” They also see her knitting a blanket for her granddaughter’s doll, preparing her remarks for a speaking engagement or just relaxing with her dog on her lap.
That said, her grandsons were excited when she appeared as agent Caroline Farthing in the James Bond: World of Espionage video game, even more so than her appearance in the Beyoncé video Haunted.
On Building Relationships
In-person is the most important connection to Maye. She cherishes her visits with her grandchildren and sharing hugs. She doesn’t text or phone them all the time, she simply tries to be with them. When she sees them, they will go to a Broadway show or out for ice cream. She lets them choose.
There are many times when she just hangs out with them at home. She lets them decide what they want to do. When visiting her grandson, he wanted to do something on his computer. “So, we sat together,” she says, “he on his laptop and me on my tablet. I updated my Instagram account. Building relationships with grandchildren is not about talking all the time.”
Maye’s international presence means travelling and a busy schedule. Her speaking engagements are booked well in advance but she can be flexible with her modelling commitments. She is comfortable telling her agency she is not available so she can babysit her grandchildren. But since there are 12 of them, she happily tells her three children, “The first one to ask me to babysit, gets me.”
One of the favourite times of year is when the entire family gets together. One year, all 40 of them descended on a Costa Rican resort for sun, fun and relaxation. She cherished having them all together in one spot, being able to have conversations and lots of hugs with them all. Laughing, she does admit, when the grandchildren got loud, she and her twin sister escaped to the beach.
On Family History and Values
Ensuring her grandchildren know about their family is important. Maye wants them to understand the family values of pursuing their passions, creating a plan for success, working hard to provide for the family and never letting failure stop them.
She shares her own story of growing up in South Africa and travelling with her parents as they explored the countries in Southern Africa. She tells them of her summers crossing the Kalahari Desert with her family and packing up their things for their journey. She says, “It gives them a sense of adventure.”
When it comes to family values, she believes in leading by example. She doesn’t talk about how supporting family is important, she shows it by being available whenever she can be.
When her son, Elon, was launching his rocket and wanted her there, she got an email the night before saying it was happening. She reached out to her daughter and told her to be at the airport for a 7 a.m. flight. She, her daughter, two grandsons and granddaughter were ready for the launch at Cape Canaveral the next morning. She states it simply, “It’s what you do. You support each other whenever you can.”
She considers independence and kindness important for grandchildren to learn at a young age. She knows her grandchildren see her success as a self-supported grandmother who has made it on her own. She passes that along. When her granddaughter asked her to get her a drink of water, she said, “No, but you can.”
She considers the dinner table a good place to show them good manners and respect for each other. No talking over each other, no talking with your mouth full and ‘please and thank yous’ are necessary. They are values her children were raised with and she sees how well it works when they gather as a family. She appreciates what she sees in her grandchildren. “The older children play with the younger ones and they watch out for each other,” she says. “Age doesn’t matter when they are together, they just enjoy each other.”
On Gift Giving
Maye used to buy gifts for her grandchildren but noticed they would play with them for a few minutes and then put them aside. She decided, “That was enough of that”, knowing that hugs are the best gift. Consequently, she doesn’t give gifts and doesn’t want gifts as she has everything she needs.
One of her grandchildren asked her why she doesn’t give them gifts. She replied, “I give you hugs all the time. Hugs are the best gifts.” He wasn’t impressed, but she adds, “He will understand over time.”
On Giving Advice
Maye has been through it all – an abusive relationship, severe poverty, the volatility of a career in the fashion industry, the challenges of building and rebuilding a nutrition business as she moved continents to support her children’s growing passions. Her stories are filled with wisdom and life lessons, yet when it comes to giving her grandchildren advice, it is “only when asked.” She knows they will ask when they want to know something.
She also knows they learn from watching her. They see her always planning, be it her food for the day or her business plans for modelling and speaking engagements. They saw her expand her business to two more continents and write her second book, ,A Woman Makes a Plan: A Lifetime of Adventure, Beauty and Success.
She learned how to plan well, appreciate what you have and to keep looking forward from her parents. She watched and learned and she knows her grandchildren are doing the same.
She does, though, have some advice for grandparents, “Be healthy and don’t complain about your aches and pains because grandchildren don’t care. They just want to be with you. Eat well and be active both physically and mentally so you can keep up with them.”
Thank you Maye.
Maye Musk, a Canadian Grandmother
Twitter @mayemusk
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