When a grandchild is born, we laser focus on this tiny bundle of joy soaking up the newness of the moment and the endless happiness that we know will be ours.
And if we are smart about it, we will embrace the GRAND in grandparenting.
G – Grateful / Gratitude
The birth of that perfect baby, who made us grandparents, is because our children – the kids we nurtured into adulthood – have become parents themselves. If it weren’t for them, we would not be new joy. We have to step back and appreciate the opportunity and the benefactors our children have become.
R – Respect
Give our adult children the respect they deserve as they learn and develop in their new role as parents. Remember they have much more parenting information available than we did. They can turn to mommy blogs, daddy podcasts and parent forums for the most recent research they crave. We have to remember they are in charge of their child or children. We are not. Respect how they want to learn and what they learn and the decisions they make.
A – Attitude
We nurtured our children as they grew into adults. When we become grandparents, that nurturing attitude has to change to one of learning with them. Talk to them about the new ways of parenting. Find out what is important to them. Is there a blending of cultures that will guide their decisions? How do they feel about being a parent now that they are one? They need to know that we view them as competent parents. They want to know that we are in this with them. Let them know that we are, indeed, with them and understand our role in the nurturing of our grandchildren in their vision.
N – No Judgement
As grandparents, we want to share what we know because we have been parents already. We are first to comment. We have been there and done that. But we have to acknowledge that we don’t know our parenting today. We raised children before first readers were on ipads and Tik Tok was how kids shared their lives. We need to support, not pass judgement on how they choose to raise their children. Instead, we need to listen and learn.
D – Demonstrate
As they learn to be parents, we learn to be grandparents at the same time. We can show them that we understand their choices and support their decisions – that we are in this with them. When their decision is that their children will be vegan, then we need learn about vegan food and serve them that when they visit. Better still, we can encourage our grandchildren to show us their favourite vegan food. Find out what they eat at home and learn about that food. Curb the urge to be lenient because it is grandma’s and grandpa’s place. It won’t hurt for our grandchildren to see we stand with their parents.
Being GRAND is being the best grandparents we can be.