I found out that over 60% of adults in Canada either don’t have a will or have one but don’t update it. I have been the executor for three individuals and I can’t tell what a mess you could be creating for your family if you don’t have a will. The thing is, no one will know what to do with your things. You may think you don’t have much or none of it has value, but still when you pass on, your things stay here. You can’t take it with you. And you have left it up to your family to guess what you would have wanted. So do them a big, actually a loving favour by preparing a will or updating the one you do have. Have a quick look around and remind yourself of what you do have.
When you come across the family heirlooms and anything that creates a loving memory for you put it aside. Make a note why it is so important to you. Then have a conversation with your family. Ask them if there is anything any of them want. Don’t be offended if there isn’t much of response. People these days just buy what they want and they may not have room for heirlooms. They may not have the the sentimental connection to the things you do.
Also, they may not want to talk about anything that reminds them that you are not always going to be here for them.
An example of this is my parents.
Years ago, my parents asked my two brothers and me to go over everything in their house. And I mean everything! We went through jewellery, furniture, pictures and each piece was assigned. I didn’t realize how helpful it was until they both had passed away. We knew who was to get what. It has been a long time since we had sorted through their things and our lives had changed so we didn’t take everything left to us. We simply didn’t have the room. We took what was important to us and we gave the rest to charity or sold it.
We were able to close the estate relatively fast because as a family we took the time to sort through everything.
The point is, don’t leave decisions to your family when they are feeling your loss. What is important is that you give instructions about what to do with your things. Does the executor simply sell everything and give the money to charity or do you want the proceeds to be split evenly amongst your children and grandchildren. Work through the decision with your family and help them understand your wishes.
Now, I get it. Writing a will can feel daunting, but it doesn’t have to be. There are plenty of resources available to help you. An estate lawyer and your financial advisor will be able to give you good advice. The key is to start the conversation and get the ball rolling.
If you have a will, pull it out and make sure it is up to date. Life changes. Like the addition of a grandchild!
Making a will or updating your current one, either way it will give you peace of mind for yourself and your family. Remember, it’s never too early to start, but it can too late.
If you have any questions or comments about creating or updating a will or about how to include grandchildren in your will, leave them in the comments below. I will talk to an expert and get some answers.